University of Nebraska Football Team Plans to Drop Out of College Athletics

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The University of Nebraska football team has announced plans to join the Nebraska School Activities Association for the 2020-2021 season so it can compete for a winning record next year.

They plan on competing in the Class B division, the second largest division in the state of Nebraska.

After another tough loss, to another lack luster team, the University feels that it’s time to do something.  That something is to leave the NCAA DI Big Ten Conference and start competing at the high school level.

The Nebraska School Activities Association is welcoming the idea saying, “bringing such a large school into Class B will help attendance numbers during Class B state games, if the University makes the state tournament.”

The football team would like to compete with the largest class in Nebraska high school football, Class A, but calls from its fans, donors, and the NSAA suggest starting out in Class B, for morale reasons.

The NSAA says, “although the University wanted to join Class A, we thought that they would be able to compete at Class B level much quicker, giving their fan base something to cheer for. It’s a win-win for everyone.”

A big fan of Husker Football said that he is extremely excited for the opportunity because he will be able to attend all home and away games because they will be played in Nebraska and he is also excited that they will have a good chance at post-season play.

Another fan said that competing at this level will greatly improve their recruiting and hopefully their record.

Nebraska is currently sitting at 4-5 on the season with three games left and have a slim chance of winning any of them. The one possible win is against a 3-6 Maryland team but even that looks to be a slim chance.

A recent poll taken showed that 99.6 percent of people believe that the Huskers have a zero percent chance of beating either Wisconsin or Iowa, the two other teams on their schedule.

Those polled included a large number of their fans, a few of their coaches, most of the media outlets, and several of the Husker players themselves. (It should be noted that about .4 percent of those polled were media members who still believe Nebraska has a chance at winning the Big Ten West.)

Coach Frost was not available to comment on this plan however one spokesperson for the team, who wishes to remain anonymous, mentioned that this has been in the talks for quite some time dating back to the Callahan era and again during the Riley era.

The same spokesperson went on to say that they’ve been brainstorming other ideas to help the program.  Some of those ideas include allowing fans to call third and fourth down plays during the games and allowing fans to actually participate on both offense and defense during the fourth quarters. Another idea that’s gaining traction is using donor money to pay off the refs instead of putting it towards facility improvements.

“I mean, we feel that winning games is more important than playing in a nice sold out facility every weekend.  However, we decided the easiest and quickest way to win games and become relevant again is to compete at a different level.”

 

Written and submitted by a disgruntled Husker fan. No polls were actually taken and quotes were made up. Nebraska is not leaving college athletics. Article submitted for satirical purposes only.

1 COMMENT

  1. It truly is difficult watching this team and coaching staff make the same mistakes and dumb play calls over and over. It will get better. GBR

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